At 3 a.m. on Christmas morning, while all other peeps where nestled peacefully in their beds, I was in the horse pastures wading around in mud juggling horses. I was mad and resentful and just wanted to go "night, night."
I was also a little nervous... not of being alone in the dark (that part was quite peaceful)... I was was scared of the unknown. The unknown event that lurks around every corner when you are caring for and managing animals during the nasty rain.
I've witnessed a horse harmlessly roll to itch his back and 45 minutes later have to be put down because he twisted his intestine while rolling.
I've found my daughter's pony too weak to stand in the quiet hours of the morning.
I've had to lure my blind horse to safer ground when she became disoriented in the pasture.
I've walked in to feed to find my childhood horse shivering in shock when a tumor became too much for her body to bear.
Terrifying moments and emergencies fill my mind. In the quiet of the Christmas morning, all I could think about was the "what ifs." What might lurk around the corner to harm this peaceful and holy day.
As I looked up at the heavens and saw the bright stars, I prayed desperately for God to protect these unpredictable creatures and spare me, if even for a day, the sick sinking feeling in my stomach of finding one of them in danger.
I began to give them hay and slowly walk them to their paddocks. In the dark it took a lot of talking and comforting for the easily startled beasts to trust the path I chose for them. In the darkness of the morning, my horses went from startled and nervous, to calm and content.
My nerves settled and I became overjoyed by the calmness that was all around. The crunching of hay and gentle snorts where a joyous sound... the sound of safety, security and quiet that could only be appreciated because I had experienced overwhelming fear of the unknown.
Then suddenly at 3 a.m. on Christmas morning, while all other peeps where nestled peacefully in their beds, I was in the pastures. I was no longer mad and resentful. I was no longer nervous. I was no longer scared of the unknown. I was consumed by peace and joy and excitement because it was Christmas morning. YAY for CHRISTMAS!!!
In that moment, I realized why God chose the lowly shepherds to be the first to witness His arrival to Earth. Those humble shepherds felt the sickening fear when the Angels appeared. This unexpected event that could scare, kill, or maim their precious sheep.
Luke describes them as "terrified." Terrified is a fo sho helpless way to feel when you are caring for animals. The angel of the Lord said, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people." (Luke 2:9-10).
Those shepherds fully appreciated this great joy because they had experienced the fear. They understood the peace because they had endured the fatigue. They had been treated by society as inferior, ignoble, and subordinate. God put them in a place of favor, honor, and dignity.
They were honored as the first to see Christ the King lying in the manger. They experienced being inferior, so they truly appreciated being favored. They had experienced fear, so they welcomed and embraced joy.
At 4 a.m. on Christmas morning, I climbed into my bed and snuggled under my covers knowing that it's okay to be fearful, and tired, and stressed, and even terrified because it's those experiences that have allowed me to truly know the Joy and Peace of Christ's birth.
Peeps, it's difficult being a Princess of the Kingdom when you feel like a lowly Shepherdess. Just trying to keep all our sheep in a row can be completely overwhelming. It often leaves us broken down, broken hearted, and down right hopeless. But our sweet Savior invited the lowest and most exhausted and broken to meet Him first!!
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”
Matthew 11:28
Stop and follow the star. If you haven't already, take time to do it now. Just think how beautiful that peace and joy will feel as it seeps into your heart and renews your soul. Just like the shepherds, take your tired self to the manger and just sit awhile. And make room for the King. By golly, the sheep can wait.
.
No comments:
Post a Comment