Quit Hiding From Lent!

So, hey BBs, ya know what happened last week? Ash Wednesday. I grew up Baptist, so for the most part, all I knew about Ash Wednesday was that peeps had crosses drawn on their heads with ash. Kinda looked cool, but that’s as far as I went with it… until now.

Don’t get me wrong, I understood it all full well, but I didn’t jump on the lent train or anything. Which now, looking back, is almost funny in a sense. Easter is the most important holiday to my heart. I well up with tears just thinking about it… and if you know me, that’s BIG for this BB. 

Easter is HOPE! 

Easter is a Christian’s “HAPPY NEW YEAR!”

So this year, I’m going all out… sort of.  I started a little Lenten calendar... a praying in color thang. I started reading the scriptures. I fasted… kind of. And you know what I learned about 3 hours into the experience… I stink at fasting of anything. Mind you, people, I wasn’t even fasting food! I was fasting luxury… in sense. And I stunk.  Immediately. And my anxiety went through the roof…because I am so broken and shameful and selfish that I struggle over stupid little sacrifices. And this is why I always hid from Lent. 

And my mind went down bunny trails. (Enter the ole sneaky snake). I generally do not have negative thoughts about myself. I have a fairly happy little inner voice, but this time it was different. “I can’t even sacrifice something for a day… and there are people sacrificing their lives! I’m so unappreciative of what I have, but I guess what I have is because of choices I’ve made. That’s why my life is hard.” 

And then I begrudgingly read the daily readings for Ash Wednesday. I didn’t want to. They were long and deep and muddy. And my mind wandered right to where God wanted. That day. And my world changed forever. And I had been stuck…. in that pattern… looking in disbelief and discontent. My life had been a lie. And God reminded me that HE picked me up. I made the choices from that point on with my own God-given free will and HE lifted me out of the ashes. 

He does not treat us as our sins deserve… 

He remembers that we are dust… 

But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord’s love is with those who fear Him…  

 Psalm 103:8

I am committing to this lent thing…even if I mess up the whole fasting thing. I’m done living in that dark, cold, emptiness. I’m laying that mess at the feet of Jesus. That’s the only way I can SHINE, BBs!!

I beg of you to lay down your crowns at the feet of Jesus for at least 40 days. I beg you to nail your stinkiest, most rotten issues that are dragging you down to the cross for 40 days. And ya know what?  They say it takes 30 days to form a habit.   

Maybe the sin and shame of the cross will forever give you joy.   

Maybe this is how lent this year changes your life forever.  

Maybe this is what you need to SHINE! 

 No looking back, BBs!

No more hiding. 

BB-tine Friendship How To Guide

Hello there BB’s!  So in thinking about Valentine’s Day this month and a blog that I’m doing over at Middle Places, I am writing about BB love.  I started thinking about this, because I am writing about how my hubby and I (RE)kindle (Middle Places’ monthly theme) on a daily basis. Well, BB’s aren’t any different! 

My BB is my family.  And her family is my family.  And the BB army is my family.  But for it all to work, God has to be central.  BB marriages come next (that means the BB’s and their men) and then PBB’s and then BB’s.  God declared all the first truths… I added in the BB part of course. 

But peeps, it’s true.  God has to be first or we lose sight of the other relationships.  And the BB relationship is then in danger.  So, for over three years, we have committed to a few truths.  We have not strayed from these even while dealing with a whole slew of sneaky snake battles.  Sure, we’ve messed up.  Sheesh, we aren’t perfect, but we always come back to these basics.  It’s all about the little things, peeps.  That’s what keeps the tutus blowin’ in the right direction.

So here they are I no particular order…

“Love your neighbor as yourself.”  

 Matthew 19:19

·      God tells us to love our neighbor as ourselves.  I think “getting in people’s shoes” helps us do this.  That’s how our BB journey began, so we started on a good foundation.  I didn’t just seek to tell her MY story, I wanted and needed to hear and learn about hers.  How does this help?  Well I, for one, am more considerate (and look peeps, I’m not most the time).  I think before I speak.  I truly treat my BB as I’d want to be treated.  And it’s tough.  It takes work.

·      Putting the other person first.  It’s like the dang chip and dale chipmunks occasionally… “You go first, no you go first, no you, no after you.”  It’s not about being robotic about it either… it’s about a desire to put each other’s needs before our own.  We feel bad for griping sometimes, because maybe the other person is having a hard day.  We make choices about what and where we go by thinking of each other first.

·      Drop the superficial.  We, BB’s, ain’t got time for that.  Back to keeping God central.  Are we doing this silliness (whatever it may be) fo show or fo realz?  Is this for peeps to see our ridiculousness?  Or is this for peeps to see the crazy shiny drop of joy God put deep down in our BB hearts?

·      Having each other’s back.  There isn’t any truer love than someone that would lay down their life for his friend.  God’s word yet again.  And a BB abides by this.  To hurt one is to hurt the other.  No question about it. 

“Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.”   

John 15:13

·      We give each other prayer requests.  And we pray for them.  And we have a safe friendship in that we know the other person is not using these prayer requests as possible innocent gossip.  Ladies, this is a biggie!  And so easy to accidently slip and do!

·      We provide a place of accountability.  This is tougher than you think.  It requires love and lack of judgment.  It requires honesty on BOTH ends.  Not just the person asking to be held accountable.  The other person has to be brave and kind and loving and tactful enough to be able to call the BB out if needed.

·      BB’s gotta keep things in perspective.  Life happens.  God happens. BB’s have been through a mess already, so we know that things just sometimes happen.  We have to step back and look at the bigger picture and process what the other BB’s heart needs right then.  Cause it ain't and never will be all about us!

As iron sharpens iron, as on man sharpens another. 

Proverbs 27:17

·      We honor each other’s strengths.  As we all know, our strengths can often be our weaknesses.  BB’s got that, so we try to sharpen each other.  Iron sharpens iron, BBs.  And funny enough, as you sharpen that strength, you become more and more aware of how it can be used as a weakness.   

·      Be first to apologize.  Always.  That is all.  Do it.   

We’ve all read 1 Corinthians 13:4 a billion times, but read it again.  It is NOT just for couples, BBs.  It’s for you and me and my friendship with my BB and my friendship with the dang mailman.  It’s for the BB army to use on a daily basis. 

XOXO!  We hope you have a Happy BB-tine’s month!

Love is patient.   

Love is kind.  

 It does not envy, 

it does not boast, 

it is not proud.   

It is not rude, 

it is not self-seeking, 

it is not easily angered, 

it keeps no records of wrong.   

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.   

It always protects, 

always trusts, 

always hopes, 

always perseveres.   

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

SHINE! Walk Out Into The Light BBs!

Sooooo... it's February... and it's Saturday... and as it does in Ole Alabama the weather report is a sunny 70 degrees... yep!  SEVENTY degrees.  So what does any good ole Southern girl do on a Saturday in February when its 70 degrees?  You got it!  Put on my kini and head outdoors to lay out!

Yeah, I know... Crayola, but LAWD, BBs I LOVE some sunshine!  I hate the winter...it is no bueno to this BB.  Give me summer time every single day!  Winter is hard for me because I literally CRAVE the sunshine.  I love the way that sun feels on my skin... It warms me up from the outside in and makes me feel good all over!  I love the sparkle of it... the way the suntan lotion smells... the no breeze, warm on my skin, lovely, happiness that is good ole sunbathing!

Again, I realize the ridiculousness of this, but let me elaborate...

So fast forward to Sunday morning, and I am getting ready for church and listening to my praise music on Pandora and this song named "One Thing Remains" comes on, and I just had a moment...

"Your love never fails, it never gives up, it never runs out on me..."

BBs, here's what God spoke to my  heart... in all that warm sunshine of Saturday I felt completely utterly happy... I mean BLISSFUL... not a care in the world... but Sunday morning and this song and my heart goes back to almost 13 years ago when my skies were BLACK... Ima talking no sun in sight. 

Quick synopsis:  I was married.  I didn't want to be.  I found someone else. I got divorced.  Yep, four little sentences that carried the blackest black my heart had ever seen.  I started thinking about just how MISERABLE I was in my sin at that time, and it occurred to me that there are MANY of you going through that same darkness right this very minute.  I'm talking the dark blackness of SHAME... I hate that guy... SHAME. 

That chronic lump in your throat.
"Who is talking about me now?" 
"I have lost all my friends and some family." 
"God hates me, and so does everyone else" 
"I am alone."
"I am unworthy."
"I will never get through this."
"I think sometimes of ending it.", 

"I am alone, I am alone, I am ALONE" 
THAT kind of shame..

Here's good news for any of you experiencing this:

"His love never fails, it never gives up, it never runs out on me....."

BBs, WALK OUT INTO THE LIGHT... let Him take your heart and radiate from the inside out His amazing unfailing grace and redemption... 

He never fails: He will in His time fix you if you ask him to.
He never gives up: He is even now, even in your darkest dark pursuing your broken beautiful heart.
His love for me will NEVER run out... no matter what you have done, where you are, or what the world says about you. 

BBs, the creator OF THE WORLD is speaking these words to your heart even now, just as He spoke to me this morning.

I write this to say there will be sun shine again, friend.... no matter how dark things seem right now.  I promise you this.  HE promises you this: To love you and to never forsake you. We are praying for you BBs in your darkness right now... walk out and find warmth in the light of His glory and grace.  We are here to hold your hand should you need it. He is already holding your heart to begin to HEAL it...

"Cause its higher than the mountains that I face,
And its stronger than the power of the grave,
Constant through the trial and the change,

This one thing remains."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JP8isf9PVz4


      

Are you feelin' like a dried out jar of clay?

Oh BB's. I'm a hot mess. I've been in bed with the flu almost nonstop since last Friday. I am FO SHO feelin' like a broken down, ugly ole, dried out jar of clay this morning. And not that cute Christian band kinda jar of clay. And word than that? I'm out of coffee. I actually tried to reuse a Keurig thingy. Jesus please help me... I've become a desperate, empty, germy, and now decaffeinated vessel. I need some SHINE!

And ya know what I was reminded while feeling like s broken down hot mess? I'm still a vessel. Even though I feel completely useless, I'm still HIS vessel. And I'm supposed to SHINE even when when I FEEL like the jar of clay that I am. Because that's the point! How can we shine for HIM if we are too "self-shiny" (I made that word up if you can't tell) for HIS shine to come beaming through? We are broken, BBs. All the more perfect to let the light come shining through the little cracks and broken places of our lives.  

You know why the jars of clay were so important, BBs? They held the treasure. Peeps would hide their most valuable belongings in those jars. Ya see, I, myself, am not suppose to shine...my treasure is supposed to be the light. And my treasure is the dang Creator of the Universe!!  Pretty sure he doesn't need any help from me when it comes to gettin' His SHINE on.

So here's what I say we all do, BBs. How about we step back and let Christ be the one that SHINES in us? Now I don't mean just not DO anything. I'm sittin' here typing for goodness sakes when I don't really feel like it. But, let God lead the way for once. Listen and follow him. And SHINE through your brokenness. You were made to be beautifully broken after all. 

But we have this treasure in jars of clay so show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 

2 Corinthians 4:7-9

An open letter to people I love to hate...

Every single day, I just love to hate you. I feel that I have reason to. I don’t like your behavior. I don’t like your attitude. I don’t like the direction you combed their hair. I don't like your dog... or your friend's dog. Whatevs. I don’t need a particular reason, because you’ve stomped on my very last nerve until it is fried and frayed and hanging on by a teensy tiny thread.

Sometimes you stomp heavily on said nerve through your thoughtless and selfish antics. You open your mouth too much and say mean things… or you don’t say anything at all at times when politeness would be a blessing. Or you drive past my truck and don’t mention the scratch that you quite apathetically made on my already beat up bumper. And you saunter around as if your metaphorical car’s better than mine, because it isn’t as damaged. Or you place blame in the wrong direction. Or you post hatefulness instead of trying to lift peeps up. 

But then I'm reminded that I am just like you. 

I am apathetic to people's needs. 

I run my mouth when I shouldn't.  

I've judged when it's just not my place. 

I don't look at people like God does. 

And you present to me a choice each and every day. 

Allow the pain of your actions to hurt me… or not. 

Allow the damage already done on my heart to continue hurting me and others… or not. 

Treat you in a mean way, like the world would tell me to do… or not. 

Chose revenge... or not.

To be like Jesus and love you… or not. 

And I begin to understand love in a deeper manner. Loving someone doesn’t mean to love all of their actions. I don’t have to like or agree with you in order to love you. I can choose to try to understand why hitting my truck wasn’t worth an apology and love you because you had a bad day. I can choose to see that you hurt me, because maybe you thought I was the luckier one and you lashed out.  Or maybe it wasn’t about me at all, and I can chose to love you for that too. 

Instead of reveling in your misfortune, I’ll pray for your heart and keep trying to love you as a child of God.

I can choose to wake up and spend the day being more like my Creator that made my beautiful life… and gave me free will… and allowed me to make a mess of things. The One that picks me up and calls my His. And makes me beautifully broken. 

I can’t love you quite like that. 

But I can choose to try.  

Because you are worth it.

You are beautifully broken too.

“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”

1 Peter 4:8 NIV

Take The Duct Tape Off Of Your Mouth And SHINE!

Yesterday we talked about how cutting our little tongues can be... BBs, God can always make something broken in us absolutely beautiful!!

Who did God choose to lead HIS people on one of the greatest missions of ALL time?  The great Exodus?  The period of learning to live WITH God that still applies today?  This was a doozy!  No cake walk for this chosen fella.  God chose MOSES peeps, MOSES!  He was a walking hot mess. The man that proclaimed that he was "slow of speech and tongue" in Exodus 4:10.  I wonder if God did this for a reason.  He knows how damning our tongue is.  Moses had to rely on God for this overwhelmingly important task... and God alone.

One more nugget of happy about this whole ripple effect...

So that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.  

Philippians 2:10-11 

We are back to the spiritual warfare thing again (mentioned yet again in James 3)!  Don't forget BBs, we are for God or against Him.  Hot or Cold.  God's will or our will.  Those demony nasties can make us say all kinds off things, and they can make us feel unworthy, stupid, hurt, anxious, etc. when people throw daggers our way.  But in the end, EVERY knee will bow... don't miss this... on heaven, earth, and UNDER earth and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is our Lord...  Our one and only beautifully broken Savior.

Dear Father, tame my tongue today.  I know that when I speak, I become open to a host of consequences... good or bad.  Allow me today, Father, to bear good fruits.  Help me sow a harvest of righteousness and peace.  Father, I want your will to be done... not mine... as hard as that is.  Help me remember that satan loves to make me feel inadequate and anxious, but all good things come from You.  You are greater.  Keep me strong in your name.  Amen

Ripple Effect of Our Big Fat Mouths

So BB's, I'm almost 30 years old...give or take a decade, and I want to go find the person that said, "sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me," and punch them in the neck. 

Words.  Do.  Hurt.

After getting my feelings hurt, I quickly...or slowly because I had to sulk a little and pray and be a baby... turn to the Word.  And BBs, I'll be honest... I do the same thing when I've opened my big fat mouth and hurt someone.  I'm not quick enough to apologize and that's bad stuff.  I started reading about what the Word of God says about our tongue. He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity. Proverbs 21:23  

(I think this can be said for our hearts too.  Guard yourself, BBs.  There is a ripple effect to everything we lay out there.  Just read more about spiritual warfare!  We can open ourselves up for a lot of destruction... or set ourselves up for success).

Next ones a doozie.  Don't miss it because it's a lot of words.  Read it over and over!!  THIS is the ripple effect... both good and bad.  I want to duct tape my mouth... and yours too!    
For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God.  From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. 
Just part of James 3:4-18 (Read the WHOLE thing when you can!)

BBs, our tongue is a MAJOR weapon.  We'll look a little more about it all this week, so tune in.  Until then, I'm gonna duct tape my mouth shut so and try to stay out of trouble!!  The old sneaky snake sho nuff loves to use our big fat mouths for his shenanigans.